Nisemonogatari

Bakemonogatari was overrated. Not bad, far from bad! But rather, quite simply, not deserving of the level of acclaim it received. Seriously, the amount of love for it is pretty crazy. I can see where it comes from though: it was ridiculously stylish, rich with visual imagery and metaphor even if it all meant fuck all; the conversations were endlessly entertaining, moving at a furious pace and taking many unexpected twists and turns; the characters were memorable and unique, constantly playing with the archetypes thrust upon them and basically carrying the entire show even if it was just a glorified harem – would it have been anywhere near as enjoyable had Senjougahara not been the immensely self-aware, ultraviolent, impossibly deadpan tsundere we all know and love to varying degrees? All these points certainly make it stand out, but unfortunately are unable to make it outstanding.

No, my issues with Bakemonogatari are rather minor, and very subjective. The plot was not bad, many interesting events that made the most of the characters within them, and the more I think back on it the more I’m reminded that its quality was higher than I’m giving it credit for here. However, each event was somewhat nebulously connected to the others – not an intrinsically bad thing in an arc based show such as it was, but with more focus it could have left a much greater impression on me, become something truly special. And that’s the issue here – it simply didn’t have the impact I was expecting it would, given the hype. Not disappointment, just a certain feeling of “was that it?”

So how does this affect its sequel, Nisemonogatari? I watched Bakemonogatari after Nise was announced to be airing in the winter 2012 season – I figure that failing to watch what would be the biggest, most notable show that season would be a bit rubbish of me as an anime fan. So I watched Bake and then the hype balloon was somewhat deflated. I was still looking forward to it, no doubt about that, but I wasn’t deliriously excited or anything. I expected more of the same – in some ways this expectation was met and even exceeded, in others… not so much.

Here is my totally amateurish review. Read on? o yeah spoiler warning and stuff

Go on, you know you want to

As far as cold openings go, Nisemonogatari fucking NAILED IT. Like, holy shit! Why has Senjougahara kidnapped and chained up Araragi in the old school house? And then feeding him and stuff? I can’t say I expected to see this at all. Has Senjougahara completely fucking snapped? Gone full blown bondage on us? Impossible to tell because she’s so goddamn deadpan. And of course we launch straight into a trademark *monogatari conversation, this time replete with tension, confusion, and some mildly heartwarming-yet-kinda-creepy moments. An utterly bizarre but absolutely interesting – captivating! – way to start this series. You know when I said I didn’t feel the hype for this series? The first 10 minutes changed this completely.

A nice, normal start then?

Unfortunately this wouldn’t last.

We flashback to sometime prior to Senjougahara kidnapping Araragi. Araragi is off out because he’s bored. He then has a conversation with Tsukihi about nothing in particular whilst she languishes in fanservice hell and the scenery bes all post-modern and stuff. Then he does perverted things to Hachikuji, and then they have a conversation about nothing in particular whilst she languishes in lolicon fanservice hell and the scenery bes all post-modern and stuff. This trend carries on for the next couple of episodes, as every character gets a reintroduction sequence despite being completely fucking pointless because it’s your own fault if you haven’t watched Bakemonogatari yet. At least Kaiki, the antagonist with bitching music for this arc, gets introduced. At the end of episode 3 Araragi is ‘kidnapped’ by Senjougahara but escapes trivially which is at least entertaining and this kind of toying with the audience is pretty typical for this franchise. So far, so good-ish. Great sequences bookend a lot of pointless nothing (aside from Kaiki). But then we get episode 4.

Oh my episode 4.

Basically the entire episode is Shinobu and Araragi sharing a bath. Shinobu is the loli vampire who lives in his shadow.

This happened

Um…

Yeah, this is pretty fucking out there in terms of fanservice. Before it had just been suggestiveness and panty flashes, but this? Ok, what they’re discussing is pretty interesting, but just DAMN. She’s physically like 8 or something. And you know, you just KNOW, the blu-ray version is going to be even steamier. Or to be more accurate, distinctly less so. And if you think this show couldn’t get more egregiously fanservice-y than this, then obviously you haven’t watched it all.

Oh, and then next episode Araragi ‘accidentally’ exposes himself to his sister and Hanekawa.

Anyway, more nothing happens as Karen is sick and writhing in her sweat soaked clothes in suggestive ways until we see how Karen confronted Kaiki, which was a pretty damn cool scene. And then Araragi confronts Kaiki with Senjougahara (she has her own surprisingly well presented and developed reasons). A fairly anticlimactic conversation takes place with some Super Sentai type show playing on a screen on the background but I guess this was all to be expected. I did feel quite disappointed, because there was a lot of building up to this, but when you think about it how else would they have ended it? The revelations and discussions are certainly interesting and amusing, so I can’t fault it in its entirety.

And then Araragi and Senjougahara have sex.

Oh my

Just in case you had any doubt about what his ahoge represented

A quick aside: one of my favourite things about Senjougahara, and why she was my favourite character in Bake and why she pretty much carried the show, was her refreshing and fun forwardness. The beating around the bush was kept to a minimum, and it didn’t take all that long until she and Araragi were a couple. You don’t see that all that often in anime, most series preferring to delay the all-important ‘and now we update our facebook relationship status’ moment to the finale, the climax. Instead, Bake did it within a few episodes, allowing the two to play off each other in more different ways (and allowing us to see the deredere side of her more clearly and often). So her propositioning Araragi here was unexpected, but not surprising, and yes – refreshing. Yet they completely failed to capitalise on this in Nise! I’m aware that the series is more about Araragi’s sisters, Tsukihi and Karen, but Senjougahara’s small presence in the first arc and her complete non-presence in the second stick out like a sore thumb. She’s mentioned, but only occasionally, and if I had to point to what constituted the major flaws in Nise this one would be right up there – not first, but still quite high. But I digress.

And then episode 8 begins the second arc! In an 11 episode series!

Yeah…

Oh, and you thought that Shinobu bath scene was bad? You ain’t seen nothing yet. Behold, the notorious, infamous toothbrushing scene!

what

the

actual

flying

fuck

Credit where credit’s due though, when Tsukihi walks in, EVERYBODY’S reactions are absolutely fucking hilarious.

Bakemonogatari’s name is a pun that translates quite nicely into English as ‘Monstory’. People have tried to come up with suitable similar names for Nise; ‘Impostory’ and ‘Falstory’ are quite popular. ‘Incestory’ would work just as well because holy fuck that toothbrushing scene and holy fuck that’s not even the end of it:

Episode 9

Episode 10

Episode 10

Episode 11. And yes, that is Tsukihi.

I don't like where this is going...

YEP. THAT HAPPENED. Episode 11.

*sigh*

Episode 8 forwarded the plot in absolutely no discernible way, so it may not have even been there. Episode 9 introduced 2 antagonists right near the end of the episode. Episode 10 has them blast Tsukihi, revealing to Araragi that she’s immortal. Episode 11 has the final confrontation… which was actually overall quite a damn good episode, with a lot of surprising but non ass-pully revelations (chiefly Kaiki, Kagenui and Oshino being in the same class/club at university), a bitching fight/Araragi getting fucking destroyed scene, being surprisingly touching and poignant in some ways, and of course the discussion of Tsukihi being like a cuckoo – that she was placed into the family at the cost of what would have been Araragi’s mortal sister. Oh, the last episode ends with:

GOOD GOING SHAFT

The problem, if you haven’t recognised this already, is that the pacing for this arc is completely messed up. 4 episodes, 2.5 of which have anything happening? That’s not good. That’s not good at all. I suspected that there would be complementary OVAs after this, like the ONAs after Bakemonogatari, and the “To Be Continued” basically confirms this. 11 episodes was not enough to do this properly and thoroughly. And therein lies the problem with Nisemonogatari – the plot could be exciting, interesting and dramatic, but awful pacing and poor time-budgeting decisions throughout, coupled with only really having 4 characters that do anything (a problem when the bright and vibrant cast was another wonderful thing about Bake), leave this show considerably lacking, especially in contrast with Bakemonogatari. One could argue that the plot is secondary to the character interactions, the conversations, the ways they play off and fuck with each other, and I’d certainly agree! The thing is, whereas in Bake it was unexpected and carried the show, basically being its strength as a series and its unique selling point, here it feels somewhat self-indulgent. That they’re there for the sake of it, not advancing anything, not contributing anything, just there.  And they arestill amusing, but they just feel hollow, unsubstantial.

And whilst these are major complaints, the other aspects of the show are pretty strong. The characters that actually do anything, few as they are, are presented and developed REALLY strongly. Araragi is Araragi, but learns more lessons this time and is overall shown to be the standup, moral pervert that he is. Karen is good-natured, energetic, but too enthusiastic and fairly naïve. Tsukihi is more considered, able to hold a proper conversation with Araragi, possibly insanely violent but overall seems rather intelligent. Shinobu is kickass, mysterious and absurdly adorable.

HNNNNGGGG

The audio is excellent too. BMG is great (especially Kaiki’s theme) as is the ED, and the OPs are absolutely glorious. Especially enjoyed the first and last ones (the latter mostly because of the thing Tsukihi does in the animation at the beginning with her hands under her chin with smile holy fuck SO CUTE). Voice acting too, no problems there – voices were distinct and fun to listen to, getting across the attitudes and feelings of the characters perfectly for the most part. Production values are also notably excellent throughout! Didn’t see any QUALITY for the duration or any “whoops ran out of time/money” scenes that were omnipresent in Bakemonogatarias it aired (or so I hear, I watched the blu-rays). The animation was detailed, nuanced, and just generally top-notch. If this sounds like a shallow critique it’s because there’s nothing to say – it’s standard SHAFT-when-they-haven’t-mismanaged-everything-to-fuck quality. It just looks great.

Ultimately, Nisemonogatari is not bad, not at all. It’s just not all that great. I’ve probably made it sound worse than it actually was – a possibly necessary action given the disproportionately high praise I’ve seen others giving it – so take it as you will. If you enjoyed Bakemonogatari you will find plenty to like here – I’d go so far as to recommend Nisemonogatari to anyone who has seen it and didn’t hate it – and it’s as slick and stylish as ever, just don’t expect a well-executed story or more than a few characters doing anything.

7/10